A big problem in this world is, people are so focused on what the next person is doing or not doing, they neglect themselves. When we are not right with ourselves, the world is not right. A good rule I’ve found to live by; if the individual is not hurting anyone, leave them be. Redirect your attention to beauty, love, and unity.

Your lifestyle choices are your own and they are not for you to impose onto others. Worrying about others will only deflect you from your own path. It is a distraction from yourself and it is wasteful energy. Energy which could be utilized for self-betterment. When you become better, the world becomes better. You see it brighter, and your brightness makes the world itself brighter.

Why pay attention, give energy, make comments, or entertain negative thoughts towards people, place or things or negativity period? Why make judgements about what others are doing or not doing? Will it change anything? Do you want to feel the heaviness of the judgmental thought/s? Ask yourself. Judgements of others and self, serve you absolutely no purpose. It does not better you, it is self destructive. It attracts more negative energy and hate toward yourself and others.

Judgement of others creates you to be self conscious. “If I judge others, others must judge me.” It’s a guilty conscious and projecting our world onto others. When you judge others, you are really only judging yourself. 

If you make fun of someone else or talk about them, you will focus on other people who do the same. What you are, is what you attract and seek. The world will only become darker and uglier for you. 

Instead of focusing on people who don’t like you or who judge you, focus on the people who love you and accept you. Remember, their judgement of you, is not actually about you. It is about them. If you don’t entertain other’s judgements, you don’t feel it or fuel it. 

I repeat, if you do not entertain other’s judgements, you don’t FEEL it or FUEL it.

Take nothing personally.

You will experience a 180 shift in your personal world and the world you see, when you focus on love and light. Could you IMAGINE if everyone did this? I feel so much serenity when I imagine. So much love. UNITY.

If I focused on all the hateful, uneducated people who have something negative to say about HIV, I’d be miserable, angry, living in fear, in the closet about my status, and I wouldn’t be living to my full potential in life. Giving others power over me. Thus controlling my life. This once was my reality, but by changing my attention and focus, I created the world I wanted to live in.

“Be impeccable with your word. Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love.” -Don Miguel Ruiz

How does one be intentional with their attention?

Changing behavior all starts with creating new beliefs and new agreements with oneself.

Make a few agreements with yourself about how you will become intentional with your attention. Here are my suggested agreements. Implement or remove to make it work for you.

1. I choose to be impeccable with my word from here on out because I love myself and I want better for myself and this world.
2. I will be mindful of my thoughts pertaining to others and things, and I will choose love and light in every moment.
3. I will forgive myself when I realize I am making judgements about others or myself.

Every time you catch yourself wanting to make a comment about someone else, do not continue to entertain the thought. Replace it with something beautiful. Start focusing on the beauty around you, and let go of seeking all of what you don’t like. Watch your world shift instantly. 

Give yourself grace. You have practiced all your life to be what you are, so it will take time to practice and master the new. Believe, Begin, Become. Your best will vary day to day, but always do your best. Remember, no judgements toward yourself for judging or being negative.

If you begin to judge someone, stop yourself, redirect the thought or behavior, and give yourself a hug for recognizing! If you judged and didn’t catch it until after, or later, give yourself a hug because you just recognized.

Tell yourself, “I did it! I am on my way!” Awareness is what creates change. Along with desire. When you practice redirecting your thoughts consciously, over time it will become second nature and you will begin to do it everyday without having to think about doing it. You immediately redirect or the behavior no longer exits.

I suggest you really sit with your new agreements. Ponder them. Feel them. Write them down. Meditate on them. Close your eyes and imagine your life without judgement. How would you feel? How would the world feel? Have a chat with yourself. Light some sage, do some rape’ (hapae), dance around, scream, whatever will center you in your new agreements and bring them to forefront of your mind.

I will leave you with this, “Be the person you want to find, don’t be a nickel out here looking for a dime.” -Lyfe Jennings